Trusting Your Own Power | Amber Hawken Dip. Mindfulness CBT

The self-help world is rapidly becoming its very own monster of neurotic self-assessment, critical analysis and spiritual materialism. ⠀

Aren’t we fucking exhausted from constantly measuring ourselves yet? Or worse, having so many righteous expectations of others?⠀

After all the books, courses and ‘healing’ you’ve done, at any point, have you ever TRULY felt fully relaxed as you?⠀

Where is the joy???⠀

It’s impossible to be open and alive if there’s always an expected deliverable at the end of all your ‘work’. ⠀

That deliverable being a perfectly-cut-out spiritual mother-fucker version of you.⠀

There are many variations of this playing out, but today I wanna’ speak to the frameworks of ‘the masculine and feminine’ chit chat. ⠀

If we put as much energy into connecting to the conscious presence and filling up with our own love as we did into mimicking what we think the divine masculine or feminine would do and say, we’d be tantra masters. ⠀

When looking through the frameworks of masculine and feminine, we are examining the two opposing forces of energy alive within us all. ⠀

I’ll try using a metaphor about a box of salad to describe the masculine and feminine aspects we all have and then sharing with you what I suspect might allow us more breathing room for a balanced, healthy relationship with self-healing and most of all, each other. ⠀

Picture a container filled with a delicious salad! Your favourite salad that has every colour and delicious flavour inside. ⠀

The masculine is the spacious, infinite intelligence and pure source. The highest purpose and consciousness of all, as pure existence. This aspect of us wants to be empty, the bottom line direction. It wants to be a space which can hold all without being identified with any of it. ⠀

Think, “the container”.⠀

The feminine is the ever-changing creative force that flows, feels, swirls, evolves and is an expression of all that’s impermanent. This part of us wants to be love and give love. To feel full, feel heard, be seen and craves to be ‘held’ by a ‘container’. ⠀

Think, “the salad”. ⠀

When we starve ourselves of presence and love, we will covertly seek power and connection through control and manipulation.⠀

If we’re not taking responsibility to give the container the emptiness it needs and the salad the full flavour of love it desires, we will try to outsource it. ⠀

And at the same time, we all just need to fucking relax and stop trying to be so ’divine’.⠀

“Trying” to be ‘divine’ is like trying to shit out of a butthole that’s sewn up. ⠀

You can push all you like, but eventually, you’ll either die of your own toxicity or explode. ⠀

We have to pull back on the try bit and just enjoy it. Realise we can do this stuff with less seriousness.

That we are fully capable of what it takes and lean less on consuming, seeking guidance and take more risks at self-trust. ⠀

You might stumble a little. But at least the scraped knee will remind you of where you fell and what to do differently next time. ⠀

You won’t be trying to remember all the ‘right’ things all the time. You’ll know it, you’ve got the bleeding knee to remind you. This is called embodiment. ⠀

If we take our eyes off the shadow and place it on giving ourselves what we (both aspects within) deeply desire/need, we’d be well on our way to being much happier chaps. Not self-centred stiffs.⠀

Give presence and love a go yourself. ⠀

Effortlessly and ego-less-ly.⠀

You got this!


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